BELIEVE it or not ,
These are REAL 911
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from
house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your
Caller : Someone broke
into my house and took a bite out of my ham
and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher : Excuse me?
Caller : I made a ham and
cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen
table and when I came
back from the bathroom, someone had
taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher : Was anything else taken?
Caller : No, but this has
happened to me before and I'm sick and tired
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to
reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have
an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you
just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and
nine-eleven are the same
Caller: Honey, I may be
old, but I'm not stupid.
My Personal Favorite!!!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!
And the winner is..........
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of
Darn....I think I'm
going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the
way. Are you an asthmatic?
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble
Caller: Running from the Police.